Hygeine

M: I am spending the day shaving my carpet. Literally.
M: My fucking vacuum ate the shit out of the rug in my front room so I have to shave it square by square with J's trimmers.

B: We really are living the dream.

M: Also. Don't try googling "how to shave a carpet". the results will not be helpful.

B: Well not helpful for your current situation but I imagine there are educational opportunities there.

M: Right. What I call "the lazy look" or "winter" has a very big following in the porn industry.

B: I think that's going to be my next goal - rocking an epic bush. I want to make some unsuspecting dude startle.
B: Lots of thigh hair action too. Hanging out the sides of the underpants. Thoughts?

M: I think it would be very retro. Plus swimming suits would be awesome.

B: I will name it "Kate Moss".

M: Or Chewbacca.
M: You can buy bigger underwear to accomodate her.

B: Chewbacca sounds bitey. I want to startle, not never get laid. Vagina dentata seems intimidating.

M: Ok Princess Leia then?

B: I like how your mind works.

M: Keep track of all the comments you get when guys first see her and we can write a book.